Thursday, December 31, 2009

Top 50 albums of the 00s.

After hiding away from feminazis who believe being pretty is a stab in the back of the femenist movement, and scared me gay, I decided to come back once more and post that damn dreadful top 50 albums of the decade list, which has taken me weeks to complete. It was supposed to be a top 10-20, but that was pretty much impossible. As it is, I had to pick, then organize these out of thousands, literally thousands of other albums.

This list is based on uh, personal subjectivity, taste and opinion. If you're susceptible to individual/different opinions, I strongly recommend you exit this page and never open it again.
I wanted to type something really witty and amazing about each album, but no es posible! :(



Album Title - Artist Name.
  • 50.- Middle Cyclone - Neko Case (2009)
  • 49.- Man Mountain - Blue States (2002)
  • 48.- Karuki Zaamen Kurinohana - Shiina Ringo (2003)
  • 47.- The Blue God - Martina Topley-Bird (2008)
  • 46.- Uh Huh Huh - Natalia Lafourcade (2009)
  • 45.- 5:55 - Charlotte Gainsbourg (2006)
  • 44.- Noah's Ark - CocoRosie (2005)
  • 43.- The Only Thing I Ever Wanted - Psapp (2007)
  • 42.- I Put a Record On - Gudrun Gut (2007)
  • 41.- Veneer - José González (2006)
  • 40.- Émilie Simon - Émilie Simon (2003)
Really. OMG. Graine D'étoiles is one of the best songs ever recorded. Very touching lyrics, plus Perry Blake's beautiful voice and Stanislas De Nussac's string arrangements.
This is the very first album that dragged me into pop world. Pop made simple and non-overproduced.
Her child-like voice and catchy melodies made it impossible not to keep listening. Thank you, Mina, for this recommendation, back in the day!
  • 39.- Taxidermy - Queen Adreena (2000)
  • 38.- Songs for Someone - Perry Blake (2004)
  • 37.- Wiser - Halou (2001)
  • 36.- The Mating Game - Bitter:Sweet (2006)
  • 35.- Guilty, Guilty, Guilty - Diamanda Galás (2008)
  • 34.- No Shouts, No Calls - Electrelane (2006)
  • 33.- Some Loud Thunder - Clap Your Hands Say Yeah (2007)
  • 32.- Me and Armini - Emilíana Torrini (2008)
  • 31.- Picaresque - The Decemberists (2005)
  • 30.- Skeletal Lamping - Of Montreal (2008)
  • 29.- New Amerykah Part One - Erykah Badu (2008)
  • 28.- The Pirate's Gospel - Alela Diane (2006)
  • 27.- Demon Days - Gorillaz (2005)
  • 26.- White Chalk - P J Harvey - (2007)
Friends asked why White Chalk instead of Stories. Well, I'll tell you why: WC is different from anything she's ever done. This is the album where, yes, Polly, we can see you never repeat yourself. While I adore Stories, and it just keeps growing on me (though I still believe it's her weakest album), found some gems in Uh Huh Her, and have a soft spot for A Woman A Man Walked By (what a mess, though), I find WC to be intense, inspired, dark and very, very original. She actually challenged herself both musically and vocally; she took a risk with this album, and I appreciate it.

Polly essentials of the decade: The Whores Hustle and the Hustlers Whore, Kick it to the Ground, A Place Called Home, 30, This Mess We're In, 66 Promises, Horses in my Dreams, We Float, Big Exit, As Close As This, My Own Private Revolution, Shame, You Come Through, Pocket Knife, Dance, The Darker Days of Me & Him, Bows & Arrows, Stone, The Phone Song, The Devil, The Piano, The Mountain, White Chalk, Broken Harp, Sixteen, Fifteen, Fourteen, The Soldier, Cracks in the Canvas.


  • 25.- Comicopera - Robert Wyatt (2007)
  • 24.- Andorra - Caribou (2007)
  • 23.- Turning Dragon - Clark (2008)
Nothing screams "I want to get an STD tonight!" like Turning Dragon.
  • 22.- Una Sangre - Lila Downs (2004)
  • 21.- Night Bugs - Sarah Slean (2002)

  • 20.- Ys - Joanna Newsom - (2006)
Aww. This album is so beautiful. Very elegant, minimal. Very complex and weird. Weird is Joanna's strength. For some reason, I can totally hear a Boys for Pele influence on this record. This girl kicks mayor ass live!
  • 19.- Knowle West Boy - Tricky (2008)
  • 18.- Silent Shout - The Knife (2007)

  • 17.- Out of Season - Beth Gibbons & Rustin Man (2003)
Able to capture Portishead's eerie sound, still a very unique album and with its own merit, with very obvious Nina Simone influence all over it. Highlights: Spider Monkey, Mysteries, Tom the Model, Romance. Think the unexpectedness of this album also makes it so great.

  • 16.- Scale - Herbert (2006)
  • 15.- Desert Doughnuts - Metallic Falcons (2006)
  • 14.- Junior - Röyksopp (2009)

  • 13.- Précis - Benoît Pioulard (2004-2006)
  • 12.- Third - Portishead (2008)

  • 11.- The Living Road - Lhasa (2003)
______________________________________

  • 10.- We Are Him - The Angels of Light (2007)

  • 09.- Soviet Kitsch - Regina Spektor (2004-2005)
______________________________________

  • 08.- Aerial - Kate Bush (2005)
______________________________________

  • 07.- Vespertine - Björk (2001)
Originally called Domestika, I remember listening to an advance copy of this album back in early 2001, and not quite getting any of the songs. I only really liked Pagan Poetry ("Blueprint") instantly, and the rest was very "dull", at least after Homogenic it was. It wasn't until I got the DVD-Audio version of this album that I fully appreciated it (how did you make strings sound like Tetris music, Björk, on the CD version of this, anyway?). Then came the videos, then the b-sides, and the live performances. This is truly a gorgeous record, with otherworldly string arrangements and a very strange sound. I hope one day this album will stop being so misunderstood.

Recommend: Pagan Poetry, Verandi, Domestica, Heirloom, Hidden Place, It's Not Up to You, Generous Palmstroke, Aurora, Unison, Foot Soldier.

  • 06.- Extraordinary Machine (unreleased version) - Fiona Apple (2002-2004)
Fuck you, Sony. Fuck you ad infinitum! Why, oh why was this album not ever released? You know that I hate unmastered version of songs- they sound like someone trying to drum a wet vagina: not right. The unreleased version of this album has passion, and inspiration, and amazing, amazing production. It was the perfect step from When the Pawn and yet, you decided to "shelve" the album, butcher it and release a Madonna-like-numbed-down version of it. Damn you to hell for it! At least we have the low quality leaked version of it...

Favorites: Oh Well, Not About Love, Red Red Red, Window, Better Version of Me (version 4), Used to Love Him, Waltz, Extraordinary Machine.
______________________________________

  • 05.- Cabin Fever! - Rasputina (1901)
______________________________________

  • 04.- Bring me the workhorse - My Brightest Diamond (2006)
______________________________________

  • 03.- Ruby Blue - Ròisìn Murphy (2005)
______________________________________

  • 02.- Wind in the Wires - Patrick Wolf (2005)
______________________________________

  • 01.- Scarlet's Walk - Tori Amos (2002)

Oh, how shocking, Mr. B. selected a Tori Amos record as the best. Well, yes, it is shocking, even for me, as I utterly hated this album upon first listen, and I still believe this is her album with the most precarious production (the piano is buried, the drums sound muffled, the vocals lack potency, the strings are pretty much inconsequential, and so on). So why pick this album if it's got so many flaws? Well, I'll tell ya: I think it's the best album of the decade, one, and Tori really is the person who started my passion for music in the first place. I wouldn't be so devoted to music if it weren't for her. Plus this is her album with very strong songwriting, and her last passionate album (plus it's her last pre-face-lift-blowup-glamzombie-doll album). It means something. It means Tori Amos's last great album.
She changed and moved on from the girl with the piano thing she had had going on for years. She evolved and recorded a mature album and I have made peace with her change.

Tori essentials of the decade: Mountain, Not David Bowie, Martha's Foolish Ginger, Seaside, Scarlet's Walk, Sweet Sangria, Tombigbee, Amber Waves, Smokey Joe, New Age, Rattlesnakes, Abnormally Attracted to Sin, That Guy, Police Me, Fire to Your Plain, Give, Winter's Carol, Carbon, Your Cloud, Gold Dust, Virginia.


After so much writing and re-writing, I am satisfied with this list. There ya have it.